I know that John C. Dvorak of PC Magazine gets a bad rap sometimes on Slashdot and tech blogs, but he has a hilarious column out about how ridiculous the terms of some EULAs (end-user license agreements) are, such as those which tell you that you've accepted the contract just by opening the box it cam packed in, or that you agree not to sue the company even some harm comes to you and it's their fault. He even points out an example of one company that, in its EULA, required any lawsuit against it to be initiated in Bermuda, even though the company itself was based in Canada!
He summarizes all modern EULAs with the following:
Generally speaking, a software license and various terms-of-service and terms-of-use agreements say the following:
- Whatever you think we said, or whatever we said, about the product may have nothing to do with reality, and you agree not to expect that it does.
- No matter what happens, including damage to your equipment or even someone's death, you agree not to blame us even if it is our fault.
- If we are a Web site and you use it, no matter what bad things happen, it is not our fault.
- If you contribute anything at all to a site or system, we own it.
- You will never sue us for anything, ever.
I love his final advice...
My advice is to have a 13-year-old do all the installations and make all the agreements. They cannot legally enter into these contracts. I wish someone would try that trick and litigate it.
I swear I'm going to try that with my own kids-- just the installation part, not the litigation.
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